How do you plan a wedding? As the old joke goes: very carefully!

Before you can plan a wedding, you have to plan your plan. That convoluted sentence means: you have to have some tools and some idea of how to use them. In some cases, that will mean using software to plan your wedding. In another instance, it may refer to getting help in the form of a wedding planner or bridal consultant.

A wedding planner can help you with any or all of the things you will have to do. They have the skill, the experience and the contacts to help keep things running smoothly. But they can only do that effectively with your input. Your goals for the wedding are paramount. They can suggest themes, but you must select. They can make arrangements, but you decide what you want or enjoy.

Getting or developing a planning guide will help. It's essential to get and stay organized. The entire effort can take months or as long as two years. No one could track all the details in their heads, even with consulting help.

But before you can use tools or assistants, you have to know something about what you want to use them for. Selecting a theme, choosing a destination and considering locale specific issues, and more are all part of the process. You won't know how to use the tools unless you can creatively input the items they help track and arrange.

You'll need to track budget, develop to-do lists and more. You'll need to make arrangements with a number of professionals who are part of the big day and events leading up to it. A photographer, caterer and more are all very busy people. Wedding and reception venues get booked up far in advance.

Just about everyone will want to select a theme for the wedding and reception and arrange for decorations consistent with that. The ceremony and the reception, and maybe even the bridal shower or bachelor parties before them, can benefit. Even getting to the wedding, then to the reception will take some forethought. All that takes careful planning.

If you plan to have your wedding close to home, or in another state, or even in faraway Italy or Japan, that planning effort reaches a higher plateau. Some legal issues are relevant, but generally a very simple part of the process. Making arrangements for venue, hotels, transportation and more in another country is still challenging.

Fortunately, the Internet has made the process much easier than it was in the past. Email to France is as easy as one to someone across town. They can email photos, addresses and contracts. Sooner or later, though, a visit will become necessary. That can mean going there twice, or leaving a couple of months in advance of the big day.

But with all the items to track, all the expense and effort involved, one thing remains true. Your wedding is worth it.